So..1 Year Out!

Hey guys!  I haven't written a post on here in a little over a year.  A TON has happened since I last updated everyone about my life, so here are the highlights:

-Once I returned home from Cape Cod, I had a month and a half of FULL TIME job searching.  It sucked.  I was stressed, depressed, and all around just not feeling great about myself.
-Eventually, I was hired by a local social service agency dedicated to helping seniors in the community.  I work as a Case Manager which is PERFECT, because that's exactly what I went to school for.  :)  It feels great being able to put my degree to work for me and get a little ROI (return on investment).
-Oct. 15, 2012 is when I started this incredible new job.  I'm almost coming up on my 1 yr anniversary here, so life has been wonderful.  I've learned a ton and absolutely love the work I'm doing.  Perfect fit!
-Ryan and I are no longer a couple.  But it's okay, I promise!  We're still extremely close and went back to being besties.
-In Feb. I had to get a new car.  Space needed new roters, brakes, brake pads, etc., etc., and it just wasn't worth it to keep throwing money into a '99 vehicle.  I ended up getting myself a silver 2010 Dodge Journey which is a large SUV.  The only 2 drawbacks are that (1) it is an automatic (I prefer 5 speeds), and (2) it is only FWD.  Since my job requires me to do home visits to many (most) of my clients, I am often traveling up back roads and up mountains, even in the middle of winter.  I wish I had advocated more for getting a 4WD vehicle.  Oh well, next time.  I am proud to say that I was able to get the loan for my vehicle all on my own (didn't need a co-signer!) so now I am truly able to say 'my' car and mean it! :)
-I've been to Washington, D.C. with Ryan last year for my birthday (my first time there)!  We stayed in a hostel for 7 days which ended up not having running water for 3 of those days, so we ended up having to get a hotel room about 2.5-3 days into that madness.  I think we almost reached our breaking point in seeing how long we could go without showering.  It was bad.  BUT we were able to see all of the main highlights and tourist attractions, so it felt great to cross all of the main monuments and museums off my bucket list.
-I've been paying HARDCORE on my student loans.  I crunched the numbers last night and by the end of this year if all goes well [I'll explain in my next bullet point], I'll have resolved $11,430 in my student loan debt.
-"If all goes well...."  Okay, here we go.  I have 3 different lenders for my student loans.  My federal ones through the US Dept of Education, some through VSAC, and one through this other loan mgmt company on behalf of my college called MyCampusLoan.  They are managing my Perkin's loan (instead of Champlain having to hire staff to work directly on managing every student's account).  Here's the deal.  There are certain circumstances in which you may be able to get your Perkin's loan forgiven.  You also have to have worked at your job for a minimum of 1 year.  I applied for deferment a couple months ago (because I only just found out that this might even be a possibility for me), and was approved--so right my now loan with them is not accruing interest.  YAY!  Before applying for deferment, my Perkin's loan was my first smaller loan I was really going after.  I wanted to get that totally paid off so I could snowball my payments and put the rest of the money that was going to my Perkin's payment toward VSAC or my federal loans.  But, since my Perkin's is in deferment and is not accruing interest, I'm working hard on my VSAC loans since they are still accruing interest.  Anyway, once I meet my 1 year anniversary at this fantastic job, I can send in a Request for Cancellation form.  I don't know if I will be approved, but I really hope so.  My other hope is that they will refund me the $1800 or so I've already invested in that loan.  Because I can put that towards another one of my loans.  So, if all of this goes my way, I'll be $11,430 out of student loan debt by the end of Dec. 2013.  GET IT.
-Ryan moved to E. Boston to continue his studies and get his Master's in Community Theater at Emerson College, so that's exciting!  I can't wait until I can go down to visit and spend a few nights with him.  I don't know Boston that well, but I imagine I'll be learning over the course of the next few years.
-Lastly, I'm trying once again to lose weight.  Now that I have health insurance through my employer (although I'm not sure how that's going to change once the Health Care Exchange takes over Jan 1), I have successfully lost about 30 lbs since mid January of 2013.  I went to Physical Therapy to have them train me in how to push myself, how to do which exercises with my body, and how to execute proper form with many of the different exercises they gave me to work on.  Besides exercising and trying to be more active in general, I have almost completely done a 180 on my diet.  I'm trying to stay away from processed food as much as possible, and focus more on fresh fruits and veggies, whole grains, protein, etc.  There are still the days when I need to stop at McD's for a breakfast or lunch, because my job often has lots of time constraints, but I'm not making that the foundation of my diet any longer.  I can't wait to continue with this journey now that I have support from my PCP (primary care physician), and other local community agencies to help me reach my goals.  :)

Annd...that's really about it.  I'm sure I'm forgetting a few different highlights, but that's most of what has happened to me since August of 2012.

I hope I didn't bore you with all the minute details of my life for the past 13 months.  There's lots of exciting stuff going on, and I love being able to share all this with you.  :)

What are some of the main highlights of your life in the past year.  In what ways have you grown?  What can you do this year that you couldn't last year?

Happy September, everyone!  Here comes the next holiday season!!

x.o.x.o.
Megan

I'm a Big Girl Now! (Almost)

Hello, again Blogger.



Been a while since I last posted for you!  So, here's whats going on in my life right now:

• doing the whole job search thing
• still unpacking from college & from getting back from Ashley's where I spent the summer
• have successfully managed to visit a majority of my friends up in VT since I've been home
• trying to decide where I'm going to live; and if/when I can afford to move in on my own
• managing how weird it feels to not be moving back into college today

Originally the plan was for Rosie and I to get an apartment in Barre, but that's not a healthy decision for me for lots of reasons which I don't really wish to divulge to strangers on the internet.  Let's just say I have a past   with Barre and I don't want to put myself in a position where I will feel unsafe or ambushed.

SO-I am contemplating where I really want to be so I can start job searching in that area and figure out life piece by piece.  To start I'll be living at home and commuting to work wherever I decide is the area I want to reside, so I'm trying to be smart and realistic about what I can afford, how much commuting my car can take until I make the big move, and where the best place for me is in Vermont.  

In the meantime I'm daydreaming about what it'll be like to finally be on my own, to be a real adult working the typical American 40 hr week, and how incredible it'll feel to finally be financially independent from my family.  I can't wait to be able to pay all my own bills every month while chipping away at my student loans that will be coming due in a few more months!  However, step 1 is finding that first career-level job to put my degree to work.

Self-sufficiency at it's finest!!!

I'll need lots of luck so feel free to leave your well-wishes below.  Much appreciated!

If anyone has any suggestions or tips on searching for and obtaining a first apartment or what the first year out of college looks like-feel free to leave those below as well.

From my brain to yours,

xoxo Megan

It's Hot; I'm Melting. Here's My Thoughts on Religion?

I'm pretty positive I can swim through the air today on Cape Cod.  It has been muggy and hot and humid for the past two days, and tomorrow is supposed to be the same.  

I consumed an entire pint of my favorite Ben and Jerry's flavor: Chocolate Fudge Brownie tonight just to cool off, and it worked....for about an hour.

 

There are so many things going through my mind right now between boyfriend stuff, job stuff, and living arrangement stuff for the upcoming months.  There are going to be big changes, ones that I hope I am ready for, and some that I know I'm ready for.

Which is why I continue to be up so late on my days off, thinking about things and hoping for the best for myself.  There are so many unknown variables in my life.  Any decision I make at this point in my life is going to put me on an entirely different life path than I would have been on if I had made the opposite decision.  That's a lot of pressure, much like the episode "Turn Left" in Doctor Who, Season 4, Episode 11.  You can watch it on Netflix or probably look it up on Youtube in parts.

So many things are about to change and I'm about to embark on a completely different life journey.  I want to serve whatever purpose I have in this world and help, touch, and connect with the people I am destined to encounter.  I want to live a comfortable lifestyle, and make sure I do whatever I can to become fully financially independent from my family all the while creating a comfortable living atmosphere and environment for myself and whomever I choose to share my life with.  I hope to be the best person I can be, and to really immerse myself in the experience of living, and working hard for that living.  I want to know that I am earning every dollar I make, and that I am dedicating myself to being the best version of myself I can possibly be.

Life/Karma has a way of returning to you whatever you deserve.  I want to put as many positive vibes in the universe not just so that I can get something good back out of it at the end of the day, but just so that I know I am sending as much positive energy into this universe as possible.  Period.  I don't want to be the person that is good and does good because s/he knows that s/he will be getting a reward for doing so, but because I feel it is the right thing to do.  

I'm not sure why I'm having this huge deep, defining moment of my life at 12:30 am when I feel like I'm sweating out every single toxin in my body, or why it feels so New Age-y, but I suppose in moments of stress/distress is when a lot of "Aha!" moments happen.  Perhaps I work best under pressure?

I suppose I've always been a New Age spiritualist.  I was baptized Catholic as a child, but once my Mom and I moved on, we stopped going to church.  I do believe there is some higher power out there, but I don't necessarily think it is one all-encompassing god (or goddess for that matter).  I think of this higher power like a huge diamond in the sky, with many different facets.  These facets reflect down on the world  creating different perspectives; gods, and goddesses in all different regions across the globe.  However, each of these higher powers stem from the same source.  When I decide to do my form of "praying", I pray generally to all gods and goddesses, (1) because I'm sure in many cases I need all the help I can get, and (2) because I don't want to offend any gods/goddesses that do exist in case they do come in different entities.  

When I do pray, I try to keep myself in perspective and not wish for a certain outcome in a situation.  I ask only that I am guided to whatever path I am supposed to be on, and that things will work out for me in the grand scheme of things "for the greater good".  I know that sometimes life hurls challenges at you right and left, but they're to help you learn, grow, and become stronger for the next set of obstacles you have to face.  I feel like everything is all a part of a grand design.  Again, as I mentioned in a previous post, this doesn't give you the free reign to let the cards fall where they may.  You still have the ability to make choices, and to decide if you will step up to the plate and face the challenges that are coming at you.  You have the ability to live a better life and to make better choices for yourself.  

Finally, my environmentalist side comes out.  I feel that all Earthly creatures come from the Earth, and are returned to the Earth (in both a physical and spiritual way).  When I die, I hope I am not buried in a casket.  I would like to be returned to the world in the most natural way possible.  I want to decompose directly in the ground without being protected by a wooden casket, be cremated, or (as terrible as this sounds), be returned to the ocean to be eaten by fish and sea creatures.  Seriously, what is the point of being protected in a casket?  You're dead.  Just let nature take you back.  I know this sounds like a grotesque, horror movie scene, but really, I don't want to use more of the Earth's materials to give me a "proper burial".  I just want to be left in piece(s) [see what I did there?] to be consumed again by nature, and folded back into the planet like a nice pizza dough.

I'm not sure whether I believe in reincarnation per se.  But I believe that we have a symbiotic relationship with the Earth we come from.  Just because we are human doesn't mean we have the right to overpopulate and destroy the miracles of life, peace, and solace on this planet.  We are no greater than the common squirrels, shrimp, or dung beetle that also exist on this planet.  In the grand scheme of things, we are all just a life form trying to survive.  So why do us humans continue to do nearly everything we can to ruin or spoil life-when so little of it already exists?  Greed.  Lust for power.  The power to feel "human" emotions.  The same components that "set us apart" from other life forms-a brain to think with and process complicated situations.  A brain with emotions when once corrupted, ruins life for all others nearby.

Sorry that this just turned into a very political rant.  But it's how I feel.  We come from this planet.  Ingesting all of these synthetic materials and man-made toxins are not doing us any favors.  Notice how you feel better after eating a wholesome turkey sandwich with cheddar cheese on whole grain bread and veggies over a McDonald's value meal?  (Don't get me wrong-I do love the taste of McDonald's food).  But the food is probably mostly synthetic.  It's bad for you, brings more toxins and salts/fats into your body that most people typically don't need, and leaves you hungry for more later on.  Whatever chemicals are used in the food create sort of an addiction.  Once you go to "splurge" once, it's hard to resist the temptation to do it again.  

Also, apparently the nuggets from McDonald's melt into liquid?  "One former McDonald’s employee warned against the chicken nuggets recalling: ‘I accidentally left a whole bag of about 100 chicken nuggets out on a counter for way too long. They melted. Into a pool of liquid. I never understood why. But they were completely indiscernible as being the nuggets I once knew."  Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2173221/Chicken-nuggets-dirty-ice-dont-dare-touch-ketchup-bottle-The-dangers-fast-food-choices-people-work-joints.html#ixzz20qwB8iiP

Anyway-back to my point.  The reason you feel better after eating the turkey sandwich is because it's made of wholesome products coming directly from nature.  All of the nutrients are still in the food, and it doesn't leave you CRAVING more hours later.  You also feel better about yourself for making a healthy choice over the easy way out.  Plus, your body runs better once it has all of these nutrients coming more directly from nature.  

All of these things are suddenly coming back to the forefront as I'm thinking about my life and how I want to lead it.  So what, I'm most comfortable being a New Age spiritualist?  So what I actually own my own Tarot Deck (not that I use it often, but I hope to remedy that once I have my own place that isn't in a college dormitory)?  So what I perceive my "god" to be a little different than yours?  This doesn't make me a bad person.  This doesn't mean I'm messing with the dark forces of the universe and am opening doors that I don't know how to close.  This means I'm living life as best I can, and doing what I can to make my home on Earth as good a place as possible, while accepting a little help and guidance from my friends in the big diamond in the sky every so often.  

As soon as I am home with access to my candles again, I shall light one and reflect on every other person in the world who is at the same life transition place as myself.  We have lots of big choices to make, and not a lot of time to make these choices.  This is the biggest life transition of them all-leaving the house for good, spreading our wings, and learning how to fly.  We could all use a little luck and guidance right now.

From my brain to yours,

Megan

My Big Decision

Today is the day.

Friday the 13th, 2012.

I have officially written to The University of New Hampshire in Durham, NH to see if they can defer my acceptance for a year.  Which means....

I have decided to find an awesome full time job with benefits for at least a year, and to get an apartment in Barre, VT with Rosie!!!

I'm so excited!  I can't wait to find my financial foothold as a real adult and to finally be able to feel financially independent from my family!  I'll be able to afford my own things, my mom won't be stuck with my bills as well as hers anymore, and it'll just be much better for everyone, all around.  =)

I have been applying for jobs like a crazy person.  Hopefully one of them (a few, preferably) will want me and be willing to take me on.  I'd love to find at least one, but it'd be nice to have a choice, as well.  "The starting median salary for a social worker [is] $33,400" (http://www.socialworkersspeak.org/media/nasw-responds-to-article-on-worst-paying-college-degrees.html).  That's a $676 paycheck every week (before taxes), which is $17.41/hr if you work a 40 hr week.  I mean, according to the article it's 'supposedly' one of the worst paying college degrees, but $17/hr is more than I've ever been paid in my lifetime.  Clearly, I will be very excited about this kind of paycheck.

I'm also SUPER EXCITED to start my first ever apartment hunt!  Luckily Rosie is also looking for a new place to live right now, so we're trying to find a nice 2 bedroom and split all the costs for rent/utilities/etc.

Probably what we'll have to use for furniture at least to get started...

I can't wait to start my real adult life and to live in an apartment which for the first time, I'll finally be able to afford!  AHH! 

Please wish me luck in all my endeavors.  I have a lot to learn and get used to as I get ready to embark on my new life path, so I'll need all the well-wishing I can get!

My goal is to get moved into a nice cozy apartment (with heat included in the rent price) before the snow flies in Vermont.  If you have any advice please leave it below!

I'm Poor.

Ah, Ramen.  We've all fallen into your grasp at one point or another.

My apologies for lack of a more creative title for this post.  I'm very stressed lately because of how broke I seem to continue to be.  And there's no light at the end of the tunnel for at least another 2 years-once I can complete my Master's in Social Work degree and FINALLY MAYBE start my real life as a fully grown, financially independent adult.

I still have about $300 more worth of textbooks to purchase, an estimated $300 parking pass to purchase and that's not including my $70/month phone bill and $40/month credit card bill, or gas for the car, oil changes, etc.  You know, basic life stuff.  And the thing is, I really don't actually have that many bills.  Just phone and credit card-and my credit card payment is really cheap (because I have a Discover Student Credit Card which gives me a credit limit of only $500-thank God).  My problem is that I don't have enough money to feel comfortable making my monthly bills.  There literally aren't enough hours in the day for me to work enough hours to make enough money to feel really truly secure.  

I just want to live comfortably.  I'm not looking to become a millionaire and hoard my millions of dollars away from society forever.  I want to spend a little to have fun every month, get by on bills, and still have enough extra to put away in a savings account just in case of a huge life emergency.  I REALLY don't think I'm asking for a whole hell of a lot.  Unfortunately I need to take out $80,000 in loans to get my Master's degree which will help me get an adequate paying job in order to support myself for the rest of my life.  

What's even more stressful is that my family isn't able to help out at all with grad school.  They've already done so much to help me get through undergrad that they're pretty much tapped out.  I feel bad that I'm part of the reason they're so strapped right now, but I also really can't help it that society has deemed it necessary to not only have your high school diploma, but a college degree (Master's preferred in most cases) in order to get a job that will sustain you.  

I'm really starting to resent the Capitalist system.  The 'survival of the fittest' or 'each (wo)man for his/her self is ridiculous.  We're all human, we're all in this together.  Everyone needs to make a living, everyone needs to survive.  Collectivist societies have the right idea, I think.  I'm just so sick of America and how the poor and downtrodden continue to be trodden upon regardless of how hard they work, while rich floozies can sit on their laurels and become famous for being dramatic idiotic a$$holes.  In WHAT society does that make sense to anyone?

I'm seriously considering moving to Canada once I have my Master's.  I want to check out Toronto, and some of the other fun Canadian cities.  After a few years, I'd like to apply for citizenship and be free of America while I try to make a comfortable living for myself.  I refuse to be forced to eat Ramen for the rest of my life (as good as it tastes occasionally-when you're not having to LIVE off the stuff), and I refuse to be swallowed up by student loan debt for the rest of my career-track life.  I want to be a healthy, happy person.  I don't deserve the short stick.  Not this time.

Love you all.  Hope life is treating you the way you deserve to be treated!

Have any of you ever visited Toronto, moved to Canada, or know someone who has?  I'd love to hear your stories!

From my brain to yours,

-Megan

Stream 3: A Proposition

I was talking with Ashley recently about plus size fashion and how frustrating it can be for me to go shop for new clothes.  Pretty much my entire wardrobe comes from Lane Bryant.  This isn't inherently a good or bad thing-but obviously it severely limits my style, choices, and affordable options.

I would enjoy looking through and shopping at a Torrid or Forever 21 (F21) Plus, but those don't really exist in Vermont.  Also, Torrid is in about the same price range as Lane Bryant, which means my family (mom and gram, specifically) buy pretty much all my clothes for me.  We're always in the store together so I can still get the clothes I pick out, but I can't wait to be financially independent and able to afford to buy my own clothes.

Smaller women have so many more options on where to shop.  This allows them the freedom to create their own sense of style, dress how they want to be perceived on any particular day, and have the flexibility in price ranges.  Not so with plus size women.  Bodies come in many different shapes and sizes.  Why should those of us who are bigger be left out of the fashion world because smaller women are more readily accepted as be beauty standard in society?

As it stands, unless you want to dress in bulky unflattering sweats purchased from your local drug store or wear skin tight clothing 2-3 sizes too small, you better have the money to afford the $50-$100 price range for a typical, average piece of clothing.  See?  Things can get pretty desperate.

So--I propose a revolution.  Plus size women and designers, gear up and take Fashion Week by storm next year.  Let's team up with some other INCREDIBLE designers and find or INVENT new cuts that make us look smokin'.  A-line, empire or high-waisted dresses do not always fit plus size women the way that they are intended to flatter smaller bodies and frames.  Let's get creative, think outside the box, and make something incredible for the plus size ladies.

Let's not be defined by our limitations.  Let's dress the way we want, the way that brings out our inner beauty, our inner strength.  Let's make plus size clothing and fashion affordable.  And lastly, let's remember that every body is beautiful.  Every woman deserves the chance to showcase all the beauty that her body holds.

From my brain to yours,

Megan

Stream 2: My Little Ottoman

As I sit and think about heading off to grad school this fall, I inevitably find myself thinking about what my everyday life will be like.

What is my room going to look like?  How am I going to decorate?  What will I store in my perfect little ottoman now that I no longer have to hide my alcohol from campus security?  (The dorm I will be living in is a 21+ dorm, so it is okay to drink privately in your room with the door closed).

An ottoman is such a perfect furniture piece.  It functions as a stool, a seat, a footrest, and as storage (if you have a hollow one with a removable top).  I will be living in a single in Babcock at UNH in the fall, which means I won't have a lot of space.  I'll need to maximize storage whenever possible.  Lofting the bed to move other furniture pieces underneath is only the beginning of creative storage.  Knowing how to maximize your vertical space is key.

For example, purchasing vertical hanging boxes for your closet space can help you get your shoes off the floor, store those extra bulky winter sweaters, or keep some extra office supplies in an organized, out-of-the-way place.

Additionally, a standing plastic tower that fits under the bed is perfect for organizing and storing medicines, undergarments, or extra make up and jewelry so these items don't clutter the larger drawers in the dresser that is assigned to you by the college or university.

As wonderful and clever as these other pieces are, nothing beats my little ottoman.  It can be a great hiding place as it simply looks like decor or functional extra college kid seating.  While I'm not sure what I want to store in it next year as of yet, here are a few ideas of mine:

• Snacks
• Extra notebooks/stationary/office supplies (frees up clutter on the desk)!
• Handbags I'm not currently using
• Shoes
• Extra sheets/pillow cases/out-of-season scarves
• Decorations for each season/holiday to keep my room festive
• Scented goods for the room/air fresheners

How do you creatively store things when living in such close quarters?  Where are your best hiding places?

From my brain to yours,

Megan